I haven't been feeling great lately about a lot of life choices I have made in the past. I sometimes daydream about what my life would have been like if I took the chances that I wanted, but was too afraid. I think of the places I could have gone and things I could have seen. But I realized something this last Sunday, while having brunch with a dear friend. I hoped this wasn't the first time I had this thought, but I'm afraid that it is. You don't get a second chance to live a moment. No matter how insignificant or unimportant the moment, there are no do overs.
So as hard as it is, I have to stop beating myself up for things I have or haven't done. It is what it is! I need to move on! I need to get over it!
I can't actually relive those moments over again, and I have to stop thinking what could have been. Because this is what it is. I need to be braver! Nothing is forever! Being safe isn't always being better.
For the most part, I don't hate my life. I hate things I have done. I hate that I have under valued myself and allowed others to under value me. I hate that I didn't take charge of my life.
Well the buck stops here! I am stronger now that I have realized I can't go back, but I can change my future. It's going to tough, but I have to do it! I am 33 and I'm going to be something. It's not too late!
